Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Decisions Have Been Made

Several years ago, in a blog post entitled  "Moments of Clarity," I wrote, "I am where I need to be in my life, and I am living in the exact right place for this time in my life."  I had experienced one of those moments where with great clarity of thought I was able to express my acceptance of my present circumstances in life while also defining my vision for my retirement years.  Resolving in my own mind a struggle over where I wanted to live, I fully embraced the idea of living in Pueblo throughout my retirement years.

I listed the affirming thoughts that came to my mind as I began to formulate my reasons for living right were I was planted for long into the future.  Each delineation added to my clarity.

  • I knew the educational community.  I understood where it had been and where many hoped it was going.  I saw myself as remaining a viable part of that community.
  • My husband's roots in this community run deep.  He has spent nearly his entire life here.  They even named the street in front of his high school after him when he retired.
  • I had begun a garden.
  • I knew and accepted the climate here - the wind, the heat, the lack of water.  I wouldn't have to rethink a garden.
  •  I wouldn't have to acclimate to a new social or environmental climate.  
  • I had remodeled my home and had it just as I wanted it.
  • I was certain I would spend my time writing, "telling my story."
All of that was true and right at the time.  I'm glad I have that blog entry to remind me of that.

Now, much has changed.  Much of that which rang so true just a few short years ago no longer seems to apply.  Perhaps, this past five months have been defining months for the future that my husband and I hope to have together.  Life has changed our priorities.  

Since my husband's near heart attack in December, and since the fall I suffered in January, the home we have loved and worked so hard on to be the place where we would spend our retirement years suddenly seemed to no longer really fit our needs.  It is too large.  It has too many stairs.  The yard is too big.  The garden is more than we can handle.  

More than that, the setting for the story of our remaining years no longer seemed right all.  The children live too far away.  The doctors we consult are located in a town forty miles north of us.  Mostly, we realized that we needed to make some decision while we still could on where we would live that would make it easier not only on us, but also on our children.

And so, we decided to sell our dearly loved home and move to Colorado Springs.  The past few weeks have been filled with all kinds of emotions.  We have been on daily emotional roller coaster rides.  We are selling in a down market.  We are buying in a market that is much more expensive than where we live.  We could not decide exactly where to live in Colorado Springs.  I had pretty strong ideas, and of course the neighborhoods where I wanted to be were some of the most expensive with the fewest houses available.  Then, there was the decision over whether we should buy a town home, a patio home, or a 'stand alone' home.  

We actually had decided to forget the entire thing and wait a year to make any big moves until a chance phone call on Saturday.  My hair stylist in Colorado Springs called late Saturday morning to tell me she had found the house we were looking for in the exact neighborhood where I wanted to live.  By 4:00 that afternoon, we had made an offer on the house that perfectly fits what we wanted.  Our house went on the market on Monday afternoon.

Now, we just have to sell!  We can't really move without a sale on our house.  We are cautiously optimistic.  This home is a lovely family home.  I hope the right family who is looking for just the right place comes along soon.  

We are happy with our decision to move.  We know we are doing what is best for not only us, but also for our children.  One grandchild started to cry when she heard we are moving.  She said, "I love that house."  I know just how she feels.  I love this house too.  So many memories have been made here.  Another grandchild said, "But we will make new memories in a new house."  He is right.  That we will do.  

Easter 2010


Linda Reeder said...

That is a very big decision. Now that you have made it, I'm sending all my good thoughts for a speedy sale of your current house.

Joanne said...

As soon as I read that your friend had found a home for you...well, that sounds like God was sending you a sign. I can't imagine what you are feeling, This is our first house and it would feel so strange selling it, but one day I know we will. You are definitely making the right decision. Family is everything and being close to them is so important. This will be a great adventure for you both.
Good luck and I hope you get a buyer really soon!
Blessings, Joanne

Kay said...

Oh wow! That was a really hard decision, but how amazing that you found the perfect place to move to! That is fabulous! It's like it was meant to be.

It was hard when we had to leave our home of 36 years in Illinois and move to Hawaii. We were lucky that we could sell it to our daughter. However, they will now be selling it in the next few years. And it's OK. It was a good transition for us.

Somehow... it all works out. Just from knowing you online, Sally, I know the both of you will make tons of new friends and get to know everybody in your new place. It will be the best thing!

Thisisme. said...

I can imagine just what an emotional time this has been for you Sally, trying to weigh up all the options. I think we must take it that the telephone call from your hair stylist, means that it was meant to be, and I pray that your home will sell quickly, to enable you to make the move to Colorada Springs. Yes, I am sure it will be a wrench to leave your lovely family home, but you can make new memories and the memories from the home you leave behind, will always be in your heart my friend. No-one can ever take that away from you. I do so think that you are moving at the right time, because we know several friends that have wanted to move. Then they have left it just that little bit too long, and one of them gets ill, and they find that they have left it too late. I hope that it all goes smoothly for you, and I know that you will keep us posted. Good luck! It will be so much better to be closer to family as well.

Jeanie said...

I understand your decision and your emotion about it. It is a big change at this point in your life but it sounds like it will be a change for the better. I hope your house will sell quickly.

laurie said...

oh my gosh, such a heart felt post, my best wishes to you, new beginnings, exciting times.I wish for you all the best, and pray yourhouse sells quickly making all your hopes and dreams come through,

Jean said...

Whoa. What a past few months you've put in as you've considered moving, decided you WILL move, and now have chosen the right house in Colorado Springs. I'm trying to survive a kitchen remodeling right now, and that has almost put me over the edge. I can imagine all of the emotions you are feeling, but I just betcha you'll LOVE your new home and new city. Hang on. It'll be over, and you'll be settled in, before you know it.

DJan said...

Oh, I've got my fingers crossed for you! Just when you made a decision NOT to move, the right home came up. And even though it's hard to move, it seems to be the right thing as you find a smaller and simpler place to be. I know the feeling you're having, though.

I take it you are continuing to heal from your fall.

Sightings said...

Big decision; but it's one we all have to make sooner or later. Good luck with the sale, the move ... and your new location. (But I hope/assume you'll keep blogging at the same address!)

Olga said...

Sometimes there are those sharp turns we never saw coming on life's highway. Best of luck in your new adventure.

Rose said...

This has to be such a difficult decision, Sally, but I admire you for taking this big step. Too often we refuse to face reality and such a move is forced on a person, rather than by choice. When we moved several years ago--for different reasons--it was hard leaving behind the house my children had grown up in and where we'd spent 26 happy years. But as your wise granddaughter remarked, we've made new memories, and you will, too. I wish you all the best on this journey.

"Auntie" sezzzzzz... said...

Exciting!!! Oh I know, easy for me to say that. I'm not doing all these new things.

But it sounds as if you have listened to your *gut feeling,* and made the decision, which is right for you now. And it is moving along.


Oh I wish you so much luck and calmness and being-able-to-flow-ness, etc. Big changes need lots of being able to kinda' flow. Once the important decisions have been made.

I'm happy to look forward to making this move-change-etc., along with you, via your blog. I am!!!!!

Gentle hugs,

Linda Myers said...

It sounds like exactly the right decision, Sally. At the right time.

Sending thoughts into the universe for a quick sale on your house.

Jackie said...

Sally...such a hard decision, but one I know that you and your family have made with much thought and prayer. I hope that your move will be a smooth one; you will make new beautiful memories, and you will carry the ones from your home that you love with you. They move with you in your heart. Love and hugs to you...

Chatty Crone said...

A bittersweet situation for sure. I know just how you feel about your house and how hard it will be to move. Looks like you've thought things through. Good luck on the sale and the move!

Beth said...

This post really touched my heart. I know what it is like to sell a house that has been your home for so many years to be closer to your children.
I did that and I like where I am living now but a good part of my heart remains behind.
I wish you the very best of happiness and good health for you and your husband.

Arkansas Patti said...

It really is a big decision that a lot of us are making. We do change our priorities. I hope you find a buyer soon and it all works the way you want. You really do have a lovely house.

Oregon Gifts of Comfort and Joy said...

This is all so exciting! I am glad that things are working out for you.

God bless,

Kathy M.

Betsy from Tennessee said...

Oh Sally... I can only imagine how emotional all of this has been the past few months for you all.

When George and I bought this house, it 'is' our retirement home. It's small and all on one level. However, as you know, it has a fairly big yard and we have added and added and added to make it even bigger. We both have said that one day, we'll probably have to sell the house just to get away from the yard work. We love it --but there may be a day when we have to move too.. That's just LIFE---and we all do what we have to in order to make it in this life.

I'm sure that when you sell the big home and get settled in the new one, you'll feel much better about the entire move...


Keicha said...

As your child, I have selfish reasons for my happiness at your decision to move. As much as I love your house, it is just too big! Plus, I'm sick of having to move furniture up those stairs ; )

There are many happy memories at your house, but as you've said, there are also sad ones. I for one am ready for to make new memories in a new place.

Dr. Kathy McCoy said...

Oh, Sally, I can really feel the whole range of emotions around this major vent in your life. so true that just when we thought we had everything all figured out, life happens in awhile new way. Thiis move really sounds like it was meant to be. But I can really understand the whole emotional roller coaster so aptly expressed by your two grand kids: yes, it will be wrenching to leave your long time home with so many happy memories. And yes, you will make many precious new memories in your new home. I hope everything goes wonderfully with this new, unsettling and exciting life transition!

rosaria williams said...

Oh, this is sad and joyful at the same time. Moving is tough; but, as we age we have to be realistic and accepting of what we are facing.

We have gone through a stage a bit similar to yours. This house is livable in so many ways, but it is also far from the two children we have left. They both would love to keep this place as a vacation home. We are looking at our options in the next few years too.

Love that picture of all your combined grandchildren. Will you be closer to most of them?

MerCyn said...

I admire your courage for making a difficult decision. I believe you both will be happy with your new life once the hard work of selling and moving are behind you. Good luck!

troutbirder said...

Here's hoping it all works out. I know the feeling. We went through many of the same questions. Then our expected future changed. The loss of a son and his younger brother moving 1200 miles away changed what we thought retirement would be like. The need for a physically more convenient house became paramount. My suggestion was instead of expensive retrofitting we would build a new house in our adjacent woods. We did and surrounded by long time friends we face the future with confidence... :)

LC said...

Such a decision takes courage and faith and is best done as you and your husband have done, looking ahead to new comforts and patterns, instead of clinging to what no longer exactly meets your needs. As you noted, you will take defining memories with you and make good new ones. This comment comes with best wishes and a prayer for God's highest and best good for you both in this new stage in your journey.

Sandi said...

Oh Sally,
First of all, finding the perfect house was a perfect gift, and I have no doubts that you will also sell your current home.

This post was so well written, from the place you were to the place you now reside . . . to the place yet to be.

Selling a beloved family home is heartbreaking, but the memories do live on, and the new memories are just as sweet and powerful. It's the people who make where we live our "home". Home truly is where the family gathers and loves one another.

Praying for all the pieces to fall into place!

Cape Cod Kitty said...

A very wise decision, Sally. I wish you a quick and full sale on your house, and that you will love your new neighborhood. What a great adventure. I think you will be so much happier.
How wonderful that your new home was found by a friend!

Linda said...

Hi Sally, I think you have made a very sound decision. I hope that things will go well for you and I wish you the utmost happiness!

Jeanie said...

Wow, Sally -- big decision, but it sounds like a very well thought out one. I think you are going to have a very busy spring! Good luck!